dust

dust
that's all i am
a veil of illusion
dissipating
and falling back down to the Earth

what ever i was
is gone
...memories
...feelings
fading...

i am learning to let it be
no need for nostalgia
or stories and labels

there is no character
no roles and rules
only this fleeting moment
stained
with the dust of yesterday
i breath it in
i breath it out
and wether it was real or not
is in the eye of the beholder

i stroll down memory lane
but nothing stays the same
how my life has changed
chapters and pages turn
another town
another home
another mirror

yet what was i to them?
do i punish myself forever
for my sins
for my selfish need to implode
and dissolve
like dust
in the air
in my eyes
there are no tears
yet i feel the burn
of yesterdays dust
blurring my vision

it's all i have
i am running on fumes
running free
yet powerless
and afraid
of what is within

as i walk
i kick up the dust
and call out the ghosts
of all those i cannot seem to let go of
with each yearning thought
of lost love
of the affection i never received
of the boy i never was

just empty thoughts
like dust in my throat
a hint of what might have been
who i might be

if i were not alone
empty handed
standing
in a cloud of dust...